Ed. Note: Neptune Public Schools has been featured in NJ Ed Report over the last two weeks because we received a copy of a letter sent to the school board from a mother of a graduating senior. The mother, Sonia Kinney (who didn’t send the copy), wanted the board to know her daughter, Teresa Kinney-Bastedo, had her scheduled speech abruptly “cancelled” by Superintendent Tami Crader who allegedly was afraid of “bad press” generated by a narrative of sexual assault. NJER published an interview with Ms. Kinney two weeks ago. Last week we published the speech Teresa planned to give as Poseidon Valedictorian, an honor bestowed on the top-performing student in a program for students whose parents never attended college. Today we publish what Teresa calls “MY story, the ONLY story that matters.”

Teresa (photo above) will be attending Middlebury College in the fall, double-majoring in women’s studies and political science.

If I had been allowed to perform my speech at graduation, this is what I would have said. Due to the injustice I experienced with the Neptune Board of Education, administration, and faculty, I have gone to multiple reporters to share my story. However, I do not know what light they will write me in. Before these articles are released, I want to share MY story, the ONLY story that matters. I want to make sure my point is getting across, not what others are trying to put in my mouth. 

After rehearsal on the morning of graduation, June 21st, 2023, I was informed by [Neptune High School principal] Dr. Arlene Rogo that I had to report back to the high school to discuss the “content” of my speech. In the conference room sat five people: Dr. Rogo, guidance counselor Callandra Peters, director of counseling services Juan Beltran, my mother Sonia Kinney, and me, Teresa Kinney-Bastedo. Dr. Rogo informed me that they had concerns about my speech, saying it was inappropriate for the occasion. Mr. Beltran had highlighted parts of my speech that were deemed “unacceptable,” telling me that my speech was negative.

I told them that my speech was not negative, that it was uplifting to hear a story about a girl who was assaulted and bullied by nine boys at her school and got back on her own two feet. They told me they were worried about the school’s and the nine boys’ reputations, saying that their image was more important than mine. I said it was unfair to care more about their school’s reputation than a victim’s story, that by doing so they were oppressing me and that this is why victims stay quiet. They gave me two choices: to not speak at all or to rewrite an entire new speech that was “acceptable.”

After a long intermission, I agreed to rewrite my speech. But then superintendent Dr. Tami Crader walked in and said she already decided my fate, that I would not be speaking at the ceremony. The way that Dr. Crader and Dr. Rogo spoke to me was insensitive, asking why didn’t I file a police report or a [Harassment, Intimidation, and Bullying] complaint when I already explained multiple times why I couldn’t. I couldn’t because when I confronted my assaulters and rapist they told everyone I was lying, convincing my once-friends to turn their back against me. I was 14 at the time, facing these battles by myself, knowing that if I went to an authority figure I would make it worse for myself.

Dr. Crader said it was the first time hearing about any of this, when that could not be further from the truth. I had confided in faculty before, but no one ever did anything. When I was being bullied my junior year, I emailed Ms. Peters about an Instagram post taken during school that was degrading and sexualizing my body. I had asked her to take it down and she took her sweet time. This past field hockey season, I was bullied and torn down by my own teammates and coaches, Christine Latteri and Jeanna Ribbon. When I went to the athletic director, Mr. Rick Arnao said he would handle it and just ended making it worse. The authority figures at Neptune High School failed me more than once, over and over again.

Again, Dr. Rogo and Dr. Crader continued to act oblivious to what was happening in their own school.

After I left the conference room, I was not sure what was going to happen that night at graduation. They allowed me to walk and sit in the front of the stage. After the valedictorian of the entire student body spoke, I was supposed to be next. Instead, Dr. Rogo skipped over me and introduced the salutatorian. She did not even acknowledge that I was the Poseidon valedictorian, for all the hard work I put into earning my associates degree from Brookdale Community College these past four years. Everyone in the audience was confused, parents did not understand why I was skipped over. When people heard about it after the ceremony from their children or me, they were furious, completely outraged at how the school treated me.

They were trying to silence me, but they are failing miserably. They do not understand the immense consequences they will now face from me going to the press and making it public. 

The school was so worried about Neptune being associated with “rape,” “sexual assault,” and “bullying.” Maybe if administrators had allowed me to speak at graduation they would be seen in a different light, but because they chose not to, they are being seen for their true colors, as a school that silences their students, one that only cares about protecting themselves. I have never been ashamed of coming from Neptune, but I am ashamed to say I graduated from Neptune High School where they treat their students with such little respect. Neptune already has a reputation of “violence” and “gangs.” That’s an image that is blown out of proportion, when in reality you can find this at any school in the entire nation. They only select to target and discriminate against Neptune High School because we are a community that isn’t predominantly white. This is something that should not be looked down upon, but instead celebrated for how beautiful it is to be from a diverse community. 

I have never been scared to attend Neptune High School because of “violence” and “gangs.” I was scared to attend Neptune High School because of the white, privileged boys who had no comprehension of what consent is. Parents believe sending their kids to a private, Catholic, or mostly white school will keep their children safe. They are so wrong. Your kids are not safe at any school. They are all at risk of experiencing sexual assault and rape no matter where you send them. Honestly, we’re even more at risk if a school is full of privileged students. Until we start educating kids at a young age about what consent is and looks like, this vicious cycle will continue within the school system. 

Giving this speech was a dream of mine after I was raped freshman year. It was the only time I thought I would be able to speak to a large audience that could do nothing but listen to what I had to say. That dream was crushed that morning of graduation, but once again I continue to seek justice for myself and all the other victims at Neptune High School. I wish I was able to give that speech not only for myself but for all the other victims in the graduating class of 2023, to make us victims proud that someone was finally using their voice. I want everyone to understand that I will continue fighting this battle until there is change. 

Thank you